that the blood you bleed; open

[equivocations]

WHO: Lan Xichen + open

WHAT: event aftermath, dealing with having a temporary ceramic arm, and possible info sharing around it

WHEN: running from the end of the camping event through now

WHERE: the gym, the hotel lobby, the guest level, his room

NOTES: likely discussion of violence, limb loss, and nonconsensual medical procedures - I'll match either brackets or prose in replies!

When they'd been told that those injured would be taken away for medical attention, Lan Xichen had anticipated that may not mean anything good. He hadn't expected... this. After waking up in his quarters back at the hotel, there'd been very little pain. That alone would have been something of a marvel, considering the fact that within the last day his left arm had been completely torn off and replaced with one made of ceramic, but then there is the ceramic arm itself.

He can't figure out how it's attached. He can feel its weight, a solid presence that feels every bit like an arm should - except that it is completely nonresponsive. Even if its joints were articulated, he couldn't get it to move at all. It is... disconcerting, in a way he has no words to express, how it feels simultaneously as though he has no arm at all and one that is completely foreign.

In an attempt to learn more, he can be found in the gym - not making use of the equipment, but standing in front of one of the mirrors in the changing area or the dance studio. He is dressed, for the most part, in a long blue skirt and a long-sleeved blue overcoat, but the coat itself is loose, and currently pulled down enough on the left side to completely expose his shoulder and the upper part of the ceramic arm. His fingers smooth over the lines where it's joined to his skin, gaze split between the arm itself and its reflection in the mirror. His focus is intent enough that it may take him a moment to realize someone else has come into the room, but when he does he'll pull the fabric somewhat awkwardly back up over his shoulder.

"My apologies. I needed a reflective surface larger than what is available in my room."

He may also be found in the hotel lobby, walking among the shops set up by the traveling merchants. His long sleeves hide the ceramic arm, but it's still tucked immobile at his side as he walks. The claim of the spiritual properties of the items for sale is certainly not unheard of for him - but neither is the knowledge that claims such as these are not always truthful, and he has no access to his own spiritual power to be able to test it.

Still, he is curious, and when he spots someone else looking, he approaches them.

"Have you purchased anything?"

Or maybe he's in the hallway of the guest rooms, making his way back to his room with a tray of food balanced in one arm. Something jostles him - stepping out of the way of an opening door, perhaps, or moving to the side to accommodate a staff member or another guest - and he adjusts instinctively, intending to bring up his other arm to steady his load.

Only, of course, he cannot, and he realizes it too late to completely correct the imbalance. The tray doesn't quite slip from his grasp, but one or two dishes tumble from it before he can catch them.

At any time, for those who might go looking for him, he can be found in his room, both during the week that he has the ceramic arm and the time shortly after, when he wakes up in his room to find a flesh and bone replacement in its stead. He has taken to leaving his door unlocked when he's in the room, so he doesn't need to get up from his meditations to open it, and should anyone knock he'll call for them to enter.

Comments

HALLWAY

[billowing]

On the bright side, his brother happens to be coming this way, and bends down to easily catch his tray for him, though there is a tad bit of spill.

"Xiongzhang," he greets, offering him his food.

[equivocations]

"Wangji." It's a greeting in return, though there's also no mistaking the warmth of gratitude in his voice - or at least, there probably isn't if you happen to be a Lan.

He re-adjusts his balance to account once more for the dead weight on his shoulder and accepts the food back with a small smile.

"Will you join me?"

[billowing]

"Mm." He follows Xichen the way he's headed, the two of them cutting such a perfect picture of the twin Jades, the way it was meant to be.

Also, he wouldn't pass up an opportunity to go see the rabbits.

[equivocations]

The smile stays as he walks with his brother, allowing himself to be content with the silent companionship. He might be trying to be more direct with his words since arriving here, but that doesn't mean he doesn't enjoy when none are needed.

He had planned on resting his tray on a bench in the hall somewhat close to his room while he unlocked the door, returning to get it after, but he sees little need for the plan now that Wangji is here. Instead, when they reach his room, he looks over at his brother with a silent question as he holds out the tray.

"There is food there for them as well."

He could hardly bring some back for himself without bringing some for the rabbits.

[billowing]

Of course. He wouldn't have thought otherwise. In fact, the first thing he does after putting the tray down and waiting the requisite amount of time that is polite to be invited into his brother's living quarters, is to go pick up the rabbits to pet them.

He doesn't have to pretend to be too cool to like rabbits, with Xichen. And obviously someone needs to feed them! He'll do so happily. "Have they given you more gifts? Your room will end up like the back mountain."

GYM

[inquiryguqin]

Early in the morning, Lan Wangji make use of the gym by keeping himself fit and in shape. He lifts weights, does push-ups, works out on the cardio equipment. He never bothers using the mirror every time he make use of the gym.

When his brother enters the gym, he said nothing at first. But he felt a tremble of emotion to see his arm replacement. Ceramic and smooth, and made in every likeness of a real arm.

"Xiong-zhang? No apologies were necessary. But brother...your arm. It's..." Made of ceramic, he observes and examines upon a closer look. Keeping his expression stony, tone soft. "What happened?"

He reaches for his coat that is slipping loosely down his shoulder and pulls it upward so the sleeve will fit over his ceramic arm and shoulder to give it adequate cover.

[equivocations]

"Wangji." There is both relief and the barest hint of regret in his voice. He hadn't wished to make his brother worry, but at the same time, Wangji is one of the very few people who he would trust to see him more vulnerable.

As such, he doesn't flinch away from Wangji's touch when he pulls the fabric over his shoulder.

"After I was injured fighting one of the creatures in the woods, I woke up in my quarters like this. It is, apparently, what is considered medical attention in this place. I am told that it's only temporary."

[inquiryguqin]

Somehow, he knew his brother is always filled with regrets. There's always an emotional fragility and vulnerability within. Foreseeing the sect together and being seen as the leader and twin jades of the Gusu Lan Sect.

He made sure the sleeve and coat cover his arm and shoulder completely. He took a seat and sit by his side.

"I fought a creature, but we're running out of arrows, so I ran away. They're too dangerous. If only I knew, I would come to your side, but..." He sighs in relief. "I'm glad you're all right."

He wish he could do more to save him, but now he is filled with so much regrets for not being able to protect him and it's too late.

[equivocations]

At hearing that, Lan Xichen looks more assessingly at his brother, scanning for any sign of injury. Wangji seems to be all right, but he has to make sure.

He can't help but smile, just a tiny bit, when Wangji says he wishes he had been able to come to his side. It's true that perhaps they would have been able to fight it together, but - the creatures had been quick, and formidable. He would not want to see his brother hurt because of him.

"We both had to run, it seems. I would not want you to be hurt as well." He hesitates for the briefest moment before continuing. He has not spoken to this Wangji of Meng Yao, and it is a difficult subject to bring up, but to leave it there feels deceitful. "I received this protecting Meng Yao. I would not have asked that you do so as well."

[inquiryguqin]

There's no physical injury on him at the moment. Other than the old scars on his back as proof of his punishment when he goes against the sect rules.

"Still, whoever decides to save you. I'm not sure if I should give thanks or not." It was strange to him. He had thought everything in this place was set up against them, and yet his brother was still here.

He senses his hesitation, and he could feel his brother's wounds. He had seen Meng Yao at the campfire and he felt the snake doesn't deserve to live, not after what everything he has done.

At his brother's choices. "You did this all for him...?" That's hardly worth losing his brother over to the snake. He sighs. "I'm only glad you're all right and you returned."

He silently sat next to him for a long-time to feel a kinship with him. "Brother, when this is over. You must return home with them. Everyone."

In his room

[sadflutenoises]

The trip back was nothing but a blank slate, and awakening to see the horrifying scene of Lan Xichen being treated in what passed for an infirmary here felt like a bad dream. He felt helpless, in his paperman form, only able to observe and not give any real help.

He'd rushed back as soon as he was able, a fluttering piece of paper as they moved Lan Xichen back to his room. It'd taken longer than he would've liked, but when his form was so small, he could only move at a speed that matched, nevermind how vulnerable he was in this shape. Wei Wuxian slid under the door to the room he and Lan Zhan shared, hoping he'd find his body there and not left behind in the far off woods, but no luck. The room he'd been assigned, perhaps? He never stayed there, didn't use it for much more than storage, but as he snuck inside, he found his body was indeed laying there, on the simple bed, and if he'd had a voice he would've let out a cry of relief.

Waking was more than a little jarring, and it took a few moments before he could get his feet rightly under him without wobbling, but as soon as he did, he rushed, fumbling out the door toward Lan Xichen's room. If he could just find Lan Zhan, there was so much he needed to tell them both, but most important was making sure his brother-in-law was still alive and breathing.

When he arrived, he pounded worriedly on the door, calling from the hallway with a slightly frantic note to his voice, "Dabo? Dabo are you there? Zewu Jun?"

Please be all right, please be all right...

[equivocations]

He hasn't been awake for very long when he hears the pounding at his door. Certainly not long enough to change out of the blood-stained clothes he'd been wearing out in the woods, and he spares a thought of grabbing something to cover it with - or, more specifically, to cover the ceramic arm with, considering his shirt is still missing its sleeve.

But the thought dissolves immediately when he hears the frantic note to Wuxian's voice, and instead he strides quickly over to open the door and usher him in.

"What's wrong? Is Wangji all right, are you all right?"

The last time he had seen them both had been in the woods, after all, and he has no memory of how he got back here - he doesn't know what happened to either of them in that time.

[sadflutenoises]

There's a hint of movement behind the door, and he feels a flood of relief as it opens. His eyes dart over Lan Xichen's bloodstained attire, noting little has changed since he'd seen him lying unconscious on that mad doctor's table. But he's well enough to stand, and-

"What's- I'm fine, I'm fine, what are you even asking?" he shakes his head, hurrying inside at Lan Xichen's insistence. He hasn't had much time to get a proper look at the artificial limb hanging at the man's side, but he can't forget the blood and bone spattering everywhere as they'd worked on him.

"I'm here about you, Dabo, you-" he curses under his breath, shaking his head once more, "I was with you, do you remember?"

He pats the side of his chest, where he'd been hidden among Lan Xichen's layered robes, just a scrap of paper, but more than enough to witness what had happened to him.

[equivocations]

The relief he feels turns quickly into something much more unsettling, a swooping sensation as though his stomach had dropped much lower than it should.

He had forgotten. Or more accurately, perhaps, he hadn't been awake long enough to process through the surprise of the arm and piece what he remembered together, but the effect is the same. Lan Xichen had tried not to allow himself to give into too much frantic speculation on what had happened, on how this came to pass, but he would be lying if he said his mind hadn't tried to turn towards there, as it does now.

What must Wuxian have seen, to be so concerned? He will, for the moment, lay aside the way that his heart both softens and twists uncertaintly at the realization that the concern is for him.

He lays his hand over Wuxian's on his chest, briefly, giving it a soothing pat of his own.

"I'm here, I am all right."

It isn't technically a lie. He is far better than he was when they were last in the woods - little pain, no lingering feeling of blood loss - and he had already began to come to terms with the loss of his arm. Which makes this, perhaps, something of an improvement.

"Will you sit down with me?"

[sadflutenoises]

It's lucky, he thinks, that Lan Xichen's expressions are much easier to read than his brother's, or rather, they require much less careful observation. It's clear he's distressed, they both are, and for good reason. He honestly hopes that his brother-in-law remembers little of the violence and carnage as possible.

The hand on his is small comfort, but he takes it for what it is, and gives a nod in return. He follows, taking a moment to evaluate Zewu Jun's state, the bloodstains that still remain, barely begun to brown with how fresh they are. Blood isn't uncommon, not in the cultivation world, and certainly not for Wei Wuxian, who uses it in so many of his talismans, but seeing it on someone he cares about, it's so very different.

"Ah... Mm," he takes the offered seat, swallowing down a nervous lump in his throat. Lan Xichen is alive, he should be satisfied with that, ruined arm or no.

"Do you... remember much of what happened?" he asks, a look of worry replacing his ever-present smile.

For Meng Yao, night before his arm is returned

[equivocations]

Lan Xichen had stopped drinking tea a little bit ago - he's going to have enough trouble falling asleep as it is - but there is still a cup of it in front of him, and Meng Yao is still here. Perhaps he doesn't need the pretense. It's hardly one at all, anyway, not when he had specifically asked for Meng Yao to stay later than he usually did tonight. He had told Meng Yao of their plan, and so he knows what will happen tonight, but Lan Xichen had not said I am afraid.

Because he is not, not really. He is unsettled, and he finds the idea of being alone right now makes him even more so, but he has felt enough fear in his life to know it isn't what he feels right now.

But he could put the tea he isn't drinking away, and even though that is normally their cue to separate for the night, he could ask Meng Yao to stay again. He could say stay because I value your company, he could say stay because I need you. He could say stay just to stay.

He doesn't, and the reason for that is fear. He is afraid that if he says them, it will be too obvious he doesn't just mean tonight.

But he does say, "Thank you, Meng Yao. I - would not be as calm in this moment, I believe, if you were not here."

who's late not me

[misrepresentation]

❰ the little pretenses are important. the things people do and don't do, the things they keep and those they discard, all to send messages to those around them — learning to read those cues, to see what is being said when nothing is being said at all, that's how one stays alive when one has no power and everyone else has so much. meng yao learned that early and he learned it well, and he has paid special attention to zewu-jun, in all the opportunities he's had to spend time with him.

he understands the meaning of the still-full teacup. he hasn't taken so much as a sip from his own, either. ❱

Zewu-jun is very brave, ❰ meng yao says, soft. wei wuxian is coming, or might already be arrived in his paper doll form — he would not wish to be too familiar with xichen when someone who might disapprove could hear. his eyes don't meet xichen's, but they linger on the pale ceramic hand visible at xichen's side. ❱ It is an honor to be at his side tonight.

For Wangji (and hopefully later Wuxian), when his arm is returned

[equivocations]

When he wakes, it is, once again, to no pain. This time, there isn't even the strangeness of a nonresponsive arm - it feels as much a part of him as his ever did. Were it not for the seam of gold against his skin, you wouldn't even be able to tell anything had happened.

But there will be time for him to process through that later. Now, he needs to make sure Wuxian is okay. Last time, Wuxian had come knocking on his door soon after he'd woken up. Now, he - well. He will not let himself worry. He will go find Wuxian, this time. Wangji was watching over his body, likely they merely got caught up in their reunion.

They will have to forgive his interruption.

He pauses only to make sure he is decently dressed before he sets out to Wuxian's room. He sends a message to Meng Yao on the way, to let him know that he has returned and is unharmed. Then he slips his Empathy away, knocking on the door.

"Wangji? Wuxian?"

[billowing]

Wangji gets up immediately to go get the door, warily, because he can hear his Xiongzhang but if he's there, then why hasn't Wei Ying returned to his body?

He opens the door to find his brother, which for some reason he looks a bit surprised by, and before he can get the opportunity to realize why it is his husband hasn't returned with him, he tugs on Xichen's sleeve and pulls him into a hug in the doorway.

He hasn't, not for a long time, possibly not since Xichen last picked him up and held him as a small child. But he'd almost lost his brother, and with Wei Ying missing, and Xichen taken away from him, he can't help it. There is only so much restraint he can muster.

After a moment, he pulls away, tightening his lips as if to apologize for the sudden action, and moves to allow him entrance.

[equivocations]

Oh. The hug is a surprise, but a far from unwelcome one. Despite how long it's been since Wangji hugged him, it's still instinct to return it, and Lan Xichen's arms have closed around him before he even processes what's occurring.

By the time his mind catches up with him, Wangji is already pulling away and moving aside to allow him in, and -

No, thank you, if Wangji is going to initiate a hug tonight then Lan Xichen is going to return it the way he wants to. He steps into the room and pulls his brother back into his arms - both of them, and if this is one of the first things that he does now that he has two arms again, he could ask for little better. For a long moment, he lets himself fully sink into the hug.

Then he pulls away, looking past Wangji and expecting to see Wuxian standing there, just to the side. His brows furrow when he doesn't see him, and then he stills as his gaze sweeps the rest of the room and settles on Wuxian's unconscious form.

"He has not returned?"

[billowing]

Xichen takes Wangji back into his arms and he leans against him, holding his brother firmly. They'd been different heights the last time this had happened, Xichen having shot up like a reed, Wangji having taken the requisite two years to follow him. It was odd, as an adult, but there was just something so nostalgic about it, that for a moment, transports him home to the Cloud Recesses, makes him feel small again, makes him think he might turn around and run into the arms of their mother again.

He blinks away the mist forming in his eyes and looks over at Wei Ying. "No, it's why I was surprised when you came to my door already." He doesn't know why he's stayed, and the paperman is a one-way call, so he can't even ask. If they go look for him, it'll be trouble, but if they don't... if something happens to Wei Ying, he'd never forgive himself. He looks on, with more worry than he would ever let on for anyone who wasn't his brother.

[sadflutenoises]

Without such a direct ride back as last time, it's a long while before Wei Wuxian returns. After lingering to see what additional information he could glean, he'd managed to sneak aboard a cart, and at least that took him a good portion of the way, but his little paperman legs can only cover so much ground, so fast. Once he recognizes the area, he makes a beeline for the room he and Lan Zhan share, where his body is waiting, and flits under the door.

He probably shouldn't be surprised to see Lan Xichen there, waiting alongside Lan Wangji, but it's a relief to see the man is well enough to have joined him. The scrap of paper waves a silent hello as he skitters the last few yards to his body, and finally releases the spell. There's a dizzy moment as he reacquaints himself with fingers and toes and a perspective that isn't two inches from the floor. He focuses his eyes and smiles over at Lan Zhan, before glancing at his brother with a nod.

"Lan Zhan, ah- Dabo, I'm glad you made it back all right! How's your arm?"

[billowing]

If Lan Wangji were anyone else, he would be screaming at his husband for giving him such a fright and showing up late. Instead, he shoots the paper talisman a deathglare and marches over to Wei Ying's body. Once he's released the spell, he scoops his husband up into his arms and holds him close.

"His arm is fine. Where were you?" He agreed to letting Wei Ying go so he could accompany Xichen. That was all. His husband has some nerve, waving to him from two inches off the ground like nothing had happened.

He was merely a slip of paper, after all, and could've been easily caught and destroyed.

[equivocations]

Relief fills him as the paper talisman comes into the room, and stays even when he sees Wangji glare at it. He will admit that it is highly likely that Wuxian had stayed behind of his own accord, but for the moment, he will sit with the relief.

Anything else can come after confirmation.

He follows Wangji to Wuxian's side, though he stays a few feet back so as not to interfere with the reunion.

There's a small smile as Wangji answers for him, and he makes a soft noise of agreement. He is fine.

"Were you detained?" his tone is gentle, and he probably would have let Wangji handle the questioning, only - he's slightly worried they may have someone coming after him, if he was caught and then escaped.

[sadflutenoises]

He's barely got the words out before Lan Zhan wraps him in his arms, holding him tight enough that even Wei Wuxian can't miss the worry. If that wasn't enough, his words are already short, and Lan Xichen's, though gentle, work in tandem with his brother in a way that's a bit overwhelming. He hadn't meant to cause them trouble, but how could he have passed up an opportunity to learn more?

"I- ah- where? It was the same room as before, where they worked on Dabo's arm," he replies, managing to miss the point of Lan Zhan's question entirely.

"I wasn't detained, as such," he admits, a bit of guilt coloring his voice, "but I was investigating something else and- and it seemed worth it to stay behind and find out more."